I had Gaiges parent/teacher meeting on Tuesday. It was awful to say the least. Aside from saying they can see his potential and that he is really a smart and sweet kid, there was nothing positive said. You can't know how disheartening it is to hear someone speak like that about your child. But at the same time, you know they're not trying to be mean, but they really have no idea how to help him.
Before I go any further I guess I should mention that Gaige has ADHD. He's not a hyper kid, it focuses mainly on his brain. He can't concentrate on one thing at a time and often forgets things that have been told to him over and over. As a mom that's extremely frustrating. As a teacher I'm sure it's more so. He is also Dyslexic. Which is something we didn't find out until this year when I went to put him on meds. I've been trying to avoid it for years but it just doesn't get any better and he can't go through the rest of his life the way he is right now. He will never be able to function as an adult like that.
So with that being said, he also has the attitude of a fourteen year old. Which makes sense because he is a fourteen year old. It also means he's prone to giving said attitude to anyone that crosses his path whenever he so chooses. Making it extremely hard to make any kind of connection with him. I'm not sure where he gets this. We've never been that kind of family. I have always been very loving with him, his grandparents have too.
They said that he gives them the I don't care answer to everything. If he's finding something frustrating he will simply stop and not do anything. He says he wants people to leave him alone and he will do it himself, which would be fine if he would actually do the work. He doesn't. I read some things he was supposed to fill out and they were just filled with sarcastic bullshit answers that would make me want to slap him had he been saying them out loud to me. I don't know why he feels like he needs to behave that.
A friend suggested maybe counceling would help. But I honestly think it would be a waste of time. He doesn't like to talk to anyone about his feelings. I'm sure some of his attitude the past couple weeks is the season, but he can't continue to blame everything on my grandpas passing. We never made him feel like he can't grieve for him, in fact, I have made it a point to let him know that he can grieve and that he can do it for however long he needs to. Lord knows I haven't moved past it. I've just powered through and gotten to the other side of the second year without driving myself off a cliff. But he won't talk to someone about it.
I'm not sure what to do anymore. So I did the only thing I know to do. I put him on lockdown. No phone. No tablet. No PS4. No friends. All of this is happening until he brings his grades up to C's or better. I hate to do that to him. I know he's not like Dawn and he's not doing this just to be an ass. But he can't keep getting by with this crap either. I'm going nuts. And I know he has to be feeling it too. He can't be happy getting bad grades and having his teachers and his mom on his back all the time.
And I know all about not liking school. I understand it. I hated school. I barely graduated high school because I hated school so much. I had no desire to go to college because I hated school so much. But I was never disrespectful to a teacher because of it. *Sigh*
I hope something turns around. Something has to click eventually right? Right?
-Kristin
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