I went to my great-gradmothers birthday party today and my little brother informed me of something about my dad. Now, I have never had a good relationship with my father. For most of my life I think he just tolerated our presence. I have moved past that, I have a somewhat healthy relationship with him now. Sure he had to go to rehab for that to happen but who cares how it came about right? The important thing is that I feel like I finally have a dad now, one that actually cares about me. So when my little brother told me today that my dad has a girlfriend, I was a little surprised. He always said he didn't date, that he didn't feel the need. What really got me was that he said my dad took her children trick-or-treating. O_O Excuse me?? I am 26yrs old and have never been trick-or-treating with my father. So that shocked me quite a bit. Then I asked how old they are, because he said he would never date a woman who has young kids. 10 and 11. O_O Here is where I started to get a little bit upset. Then my brother told me that my dad and his girlfriend were going to Chicago, that my dad called my brother and asked him where to take her. *Sigh* Why do I feel so...hurt..about this? I'm over the fact that he treated us like crap. He has drank and done drugs our entire lives, which lead to his behavior. But then he meets this other woman and BOOM he wants to spend time with her kids?? *Sigh* So then my brother says that not only has he done the previous things but he has slowed down on his drinking he told my brother that it's about time he slowed down. What. The. F???
Don't get it twisted, I have no problem with my parents dating other people. My mother has been with her fiance for 5yrs. I don't care. It's not about that. It's about the fact that he's my dad but he never did anything like that with us. I dunno. Perhaps I'm over thinking it. It just sort of hurt my feelings, that's all.
Do you think I'm crazy?
I am sure this is very hard.....and I honestly don't blame you for feeling "jealous". It sounds like you feel like he is "getting Better" for her and her kids, and you don't know why he couldn't do it for you. When it comes to addicts they won't do it til they are ready...and maybe he would have done it even if he hadn't met this girl. Your feelings are %100 justified! I guess all you can do now, is be glad he is finally making an attempt to get better...and be glad your kids won't know him how you did as a kid. Their grandpa might be a good example and not how he was when you were a kid! Hang in there!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Katherine. Thank you for understanding when I don't think anyone else really does.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, Kristin. You're definitely not crazy =/
ReplyDeleteIan has never gotten along with his dad (they haven't been on talking terms for a while, now). His parents got divorced a year ago, and after like 2 months of being divorced he already had a replacement family. He takes his new gf and her daughter on vacations and spends a ton of time with them... something he didn't do with Ian.
Hang in there, girl!
<3 Jessie