July 22, 2016

{Don't Go Shopping When You Don't Like Your Body}

My uncle is getting married next weekend. Which means I have to actually leave my house. Not only that but I have to be presentable while doing so. And according my sister, pajama pants and/or yoga pants are not acceptable wedding attire. I think she's crazy. I probably would have walked down the isle in sweats if I thought I could have gotten away with it. But I guess that's me. I'm lazy so I dress like a hobo. Don't pretend like you're pulling out your good clothes to sit around the house or do laundry. Please girl, you're in the same boat I am at this point. Don't deny it!

I don't so much mind the having to go out in public in something presentable part of this whole situation. I like to look nice occasionally. The problem is that I can never find anything to wear.

I'm a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. I like to be comfortable in whatever I'm wearing. I always have. Luckily, my uncle is also a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy so jeans are acceptable wedding attire (they were with mine too of course).

So my sister and I ventured out into the world today (which is now yesterday because it's 3am as I'm writing this) in search of something to cover our bodies. I wish I hadn't. I wish I would have stayed home or RSVP'd "I'm not coming if I have to wear pants", but I didn't. Because I'm just thinking of it now. Damn me!

We went to two different malls, Ross, and even a boutique type store. I bought one pair of pants people. One. And I don't think they're really acceptable wedding wear. So I'm still without an outfit for this shin dig.

Oh there were plenty of cute clothes, but none of them fit me. Nothing. I tried on a couple dresses, both of which looked like effing tents on me. I finally decided on some jean capri pants but those cut me off in the mid section and would have been too big if I went up another size. Then they'd have been falling off of me. I tried on a few different shirts too and couldn't get them over my boobs. My sister, on the other hand, found her outfit and was done.

When we decided we'd done enough shopping for the day I left her and ended up at another Ross store. Where I tried on three more shirts and all three of them were awful. Nothing hangs like it's supposed to on me. It never has. Even when I was 130 pounds I had a hard time finding things that fit me because of my boobs. It's annoying as hell to go into a store ready to buy up everything and walk out with nothing because you couldn't find anything to go over a part of your body that you can't do anything about.

When I lost that weight last year, I still had big boobs. I was still struggling to find shirts that fit me because I can't have the girls making unscheduled appearances. It's embarrassing.

Not to mention it was ungodly hot out. It felt like we were roasting from the inside out when we were walking from the car to the store and back. Then it seemed like every store we went to both stunk (one even smelled like dog poo) and had turned off the air conditioner. It was awful.

I know the heat was part of my problem. It was hotter in one store than it was outside! That does not make for a good shopping trip.

I'm going to try again tomorrow since it rained tonight (or this morning..) and see if I can't find something to wear. I saw a lot of cute stuff yesterday at the second Ross store but I was so focused on finding something to wear to the wedding that I bypassed everything.

If I can't find something by this weekend, I'm going naked. Sorry people.