March 19, 2013

{For the people who live or stay frequently in my house}

Dear Teenager, Drama Queen, and G-

At ages 15, 11, and 10 I would think you would be capable of picking up after yourselves. Obviously not. So I'm going to make a change to the way things are run around here. You may not like it, but since you don't pay the bills, I don't care :).

First of all- I am not the maid. Please do not forget this. I do not get paid for the work I do. When you have food on the table and clean clothes in your drawers it is because I love you and want you to have nice and clean things.

Second- The days of coming in and dropping your things inside the back door and running off to do whatever, are over. If I have to pick up or move your things, they will disappear. I should not have to tell kids as old as yourselves where your things go. You're not new around here. You know. Put them there, or lose them. End of story.

Third- If I have to pick up your things more than once to make them disappear, they will not be going "in my room" until you take better care of your stuff. Oh no. They will go to good will. I'm sure that if you don't care about an item enough to put it where it belongs, some other child will be happy to take it off your hands. Trust me.

Fourth- Trash goes in the trash can. Not on the bedroom floors (because you're not supposed to have food or drink upstairs anyway..and you are all 3 aware of this), the living room floor, or the kitchen table. It is just as easy for you to throw it away when you empty it as it is for me to pick it up once you're off doing something else. Because it's obviously pointless for me to say "I'm going to throw it away" as your punishment, I won't. Oh I'll still pick it up. Especially when you leave the garbage on my living room floor and then go home leaving me with the junk to clean up, obviously it's not going to sit there for a week. I will, however, have you clean the entire room, whichever one the garbage was found in. Maybe if you have to clean up other peoples junk you'll think twice about making me clean yours.

So there we have it. New rules. Deal with them or deal with the consequences. Your choice. Thanks.

Not the damn maid.